I stood in the shower this morning, and cried. Each water stream felt like pins and needles on my body. I reached for a just-out-of-the-dryer towel and cringed when it touched my back. It must have weighed 50 pounds. I'm not sure how, but I managed to get a comb through my hair, crying the entire time.
I got dressed and put on my uniform as of late: flannel pants, sweatshirt, and a terry cloth robe. And I'm still cold. Chattering teeth and rings-are-loose-on-my-fingers kind of cold.
I can't remember the last time I had a fever and intense body aches, along with severe chest and head congestion. But, going on day four of feeling this horrible reminds me why being healthy is not something to take for granted.
I've been a lousy wife, mom, and friend lately. My husband has stepped up to the plate and gone above and beyond to keep things close to normal at home. My kids are shy around me because they know I could break into a cough attack or run to the bathroom to vomit at any moment. I think I'm scary to them. (Good grief, I'm scary to myself right now!) And, so many of you have asked about Passion 2013 and I've smiled when I read your emails and texts but haven't had energy to reply. Forgive me?
Passion was incredible and amazing and motivating and humbling and convicting and intense and powerful and mind-changing all at the same time. I think if I tried to give personal insights and take-aways right now it would come across as a jumbled mess because my shaky self and foggy mind wouldn't put out anything sensical. Who knows, maybe this post is all nonsense, too.
Sometime soon I'll share some Christmas highlights. And, Christmas this year happened to be one of the best ever. I have some exciting things to share about new directions for our family this coming year. I have thoughts about asking you to join me in pursuing inconvenience for the purpose of joy. Yes, you read that right. Read that again and think about it - I'm headed somewhere inconvenient and want you to come with me.
But for today, today it's me and the tissue box and orange juice and Tylenol and my bed. Again. I'm fairly impressed, however, that I've sat up for the past 10 minutes to pound out this short post. That's the most activity and thinking I've done since Saturday evening.